My friends tell me I’m too smart for things like love, emotions, and movies (I tend to criticize sci-fi movies too much for their lack of fidelity to physics)
I guess what they were right.
I am spending time with someone I really like and though it feels nice to be with a person who also likes me, I can’t help but think A LOT of other stuff about dating.
What if this person finds me boring?
What if this person is also seeing someone else without me knowing?
What if I would lose this feeling and become a certified douchebag?
What if this won’t work?
I kept thinking about the negative possibilites that I forgot to feel what I felt whenever I’m with this person I really like.
To be fair, it’s my first time to take dating seriously and I am all new to this.
But one thing that sets me apart from people who has long been wanting to date or meet people to engage in a relationship is that I have been alone and lonely for so long that I don’t want to lose someone who has finally made me feel “not alone, never lonely”.
I can’t help but overthink because I don’t want to go back to that place.
Until I finally came to realize that by overthinking, I am trying to go back to that dark corner.
So I stopped.
I decided I should just feel the warm feeling, appreciate what we have at the moment, be vulnerable, be loved and love.
I used to think that I was too smart for things like love, but I guess that was just a part of me who was still longing for something that doesn’t require thinking.